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♥Monday, March 31, 2008 ' 9:49 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

i would say that it was such an honour to be an emcee along with mahirah for this very event...

well finally the wait was over today for the 1st student leaders investiture...

i would not say it was perfect but in fact it was gd enough that the student population did not fall asleep

haha...

i would say that im having so much fun recently...

i did the school flag today along with siying doin the national flag n rey with the parade commanding...

i do know that in exactly a week i would no more be an executive member of the student council..

sadly no more duties and no more scolding juniors...

does it hav to end like this in the end??

haha

i feel so pathetic grumbling abt the fact tat i wld hav to step down...

its the fact...

i love the council i mean i love the ex co so much

that it pains me to leave like this...

secret obsession had taken control over me today...

i jus loved the fact tha i get to be surrounded by cute gys

lol...

still i jus wish my secret obsession would end...

it does not feel right

bt its also hard to let go...

& oh i think im falling in love with him all over again

um i hope its a crush

becoz its always me & you...

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♥ ' 3:47 AM ♥

Awesome. ♥

i've been moving on...
especially after having a great march 28...
right mango *winks*
actually i dn noe why i even went on with this idea...
bt in the end ive got nothing to loose...
jus that it bothers me to noe that mr.mango is always very busy...
so busy that he takes a long time to reply my ims...
anyway after the big march 28 its like im counting down to our anniversary??
haha...
i can't believe im saying this but i can't wait for our 1 year anniversary
oh what the heck...
1 month anniversary is not even here
haha

still nothing cld wipe away the tears that keep falling everytime i listen to the song Sum 41 - With Me...
rey introed the song to me
and guess what
everytime i hear it i start crying badly...
thinking abt the 8 of us...
and how we wld move on after this.
for me life wld nt be normal...
im really gonna rmb u guys...
u guys mean so much to me...
and if ever i said that i hated u guys...
well i take it back...
coz u peeps are the best...
n whenever i hear this song...
i will rmb everything that has happened btw us so far...

its like the wee hours of the morning and here i am blogging...
its all becoz i can't sleep
and all of a sudden im afraid of dying
afraid that i would die without letting *HIM* know how i feel abt him...

anyway church wasn't so great yesterday...
and that's becoz we did nt have tambourine dance...
isn't that pathetic...
worship wasn't so great...
i did nt feel his presence that much compared to the times when we dance n sing unto the lord...
i liked the sermon...
the new pastor preached abt eyes being opened and everything...

i held his hands and i felt a chill run down my spine...
it was a good chill actually...
i wanted to hold his cold hands forever and never let go...
bt sadly we finished praying and we had to let go...

Labels: Pressure

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♥Saturday, March 29, 2008 ' 5:07 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

i don't get anything...
my life is a mixture of confusion.hatred and depression...
boy oh boy am i going to miss my council...
yesterday the new council executive committee was announced...
gosh they were really a bunch...

Chairman: Susan
V-Chairman: Farhanah&Rachel
Secretary: Rebecca *yay someone i love is taking over my position*
Ass Secretary: Elaine
Welfare Co-Ordinator: Dina
Ass: Irhana&Eos
Logistics Co-Ordinator: Jie Ying
Ass: Yusof
Planning Co-ordinator: Thanusha
Ass: Randolph

ok some were expected n some wasn't...
i mean wth??
wat happened to my dear cute chubby asraf...
arghh...
i think he deserved to be in more than anyone else...
all the assistants are the sec 2's and the rest of them are sec 3's...
after the excecuitve committee were announced si ying wanted to talk to them...
and without warning she started crying...
since the chairman started crying then wat wld the vice-chair do??
cai ning also started...
then obvioucly i started to feel bad...
how can the council hav many ppl who can't make it...
is this the end??
after i started crying, tracia too cld nt control...
left with the 3 guys and abby who refused to let loose their emotions...
i felt so so bad...
our investiture is on the 7th april...
n im sure on stage when the current ex-co will be seated, we will start crying...
wth...
im crying now already...
im gonna miss all the funt imes we had as an executive council...
boowhhaa...

im gonna miss coming to sch early.
standing outside the general office,
taking out my tie and wearing it.
talking to my juniors.
then fool ard with the 3 guys...
distrudb my juniors...
i hav to get used to goin back to assemble...
gonna miss pulling the flag...
gonna miss everything...
& anything...
gonna miss my tie...
gonna miss my executive pin...
gonna miss my neat attire...
gonna miss having council meeting
gonna miss the council room where we had so much of fun...
*the council room's lights are blurring, guess they dn wan us to leave either, in fact 1 if the lights is gone& we're left with 1 more to go*
most importantly
gonna miss my council room key which i lost

gonna miss siying's jokes
gonna miss caining's hugs
gonna miss my bro (Mas Selamat) , veeky's stupid name calling *krishnan*
gonna miss jianwen (Dumbo) n his dumb jokes abt talking to the air...*chookim*
gonna miss rey (King Protoss) and his star craft *henry*
gonna miss tracia and her smile...
gonna miss abigail (Nuts) and her stupid crazy wacky talks...

im so afraid that after we step down we would become jus normal *hi & bye* forgotten friends...
and being back to friends would mean that we would become strangers...
would our family last forever??
how i wish i took back my words about steeping down soon...
i mean its so horrible...
then i was praying to step down bt now all i think abt is the council
all i see when i close my eyes is the ex-co members
n all my tears contain all the times they used to cheer me up...
make my day like no one else's...

when we 1st came together, we had differences...
i don't deny
bt then we bonded within moments...
n now we can't believe we hav to part...
will i be forgotten??
in my journey of life...
no matter how many friends i may have and no matter how many relationships i come across
i would never forget u guys...
never...:(
im crying so bad that now i feel like im empty...
so empty that i could keep goin for hours...
bt it has to end somewhere...and here i end it...

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♥Thursday, March 27, 2008 ' 9:14 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

I have no idea what is happening to me??

I'm becoming lazier and for heaven's sake its my O Levels this year and I haven't started preparation...

I've started to dream about the perfect guy in my life when "hello, i'm supposed to be concentrating on my studies", so that I can become an engineer when i grow up...

Well why think go far...

With my O Level results i should be able to get into an enginering course in poly...

For only God know how the cut-ogg points might change when i'm applying for poly...

I was sick again...

Mentally, emotionally and physically...

So stayed in again, which certainly isn't good for someone like me who loves school...

Decided to get over my previous relationship because for all I know, that fellow is fickle minded and im sure he can't keep his women happy...

And certainly im not happy...

Love my blog so much that now instead of doing my F&N research which was due a week ago, im blogging...

Hahaha...
Tomorrow im sure it would be an extra long day...

I hope I don't get emo easily...

And I hope that atleast tomorrow I would have a relaxed day...

Good bye people...

*The Hot sun caressed her tanned skin while the fierce breeze whipped her plain white dress against her body

*Boats glided in surreal manner that took her back to the days of her childhood

*Utter misery, and she would rather have fishhooks pounded into her body than to ever step foot into this land again.

*Her long blond hair, slapped against her skin as she sought some peace for her troubled thoughts.

* Even now she could feel his voice as he held her hand on top of the water for her to feel the softness of the waves as they whispered against her tiny palm

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♥Wednesday, March 26, 2008 ' 2:51 AM ♥

Awesome. ♥

argh...
im having a big secret obssesion with 2 guys at the same time...
i mean what the heack is goin on with me??
am i like any normal girl...
these 2 guys from my school are extremly charming and no matter how close i try to get to them, it doesn't work...
LOL...
maybe secret crushes might never work out for me...
i dunno...
still i dunno why i can't get any better relationships either...

sometimes i find that people ard me don't take great chances to be happy for a lifetime...
maybe they hav reasons or such...
personal reasons i guess so its nt good to pry into someone's personal life...
i have some so called *great* friends who try to get the info out just like that...
i can't...
very gd talker bt can't get a person to talk...
unless the person pities me...
coz i usally beg to make a person talk...
bt now coming ot my senses...
i would like to tell me 2 *great* friends to let her decide her own life...
i dn think anyone wld like to make it public either...
bt nvm...
she has had her own reason so let's not bother her now...

n you...
how dare u say that she is a betrayer...
i mean what the heck??
she was not at fault so how dare, n where on earth did u get that stupid idea of yours...
wisen up little girl...
she is your friend...
some one who maybe even sacrificed hers to get you what u wanted so u jolly well shut the hell up...
jus admit yr jealous for not getting what you wanted...
bt its time to more on right...
he hates you...
so much...
so don't act like a bitch*

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♥ ' 2:12 AM ♥

Awesome. ♥

right its quite early in the morning already...
very early still...
could not sleep last night...
went through quite a bit of life's hiccup...

monday wasn't so bad...
sch went on as normal...
had the rehersal for the CCA leader&Class Comm&NE Ambassadors...
already started off with toothache that day becoz my tooth has being growing at the back of another teeth.
well during the rehersal, everything went on so great...
i am mahirah were fooling around with our mic and our script was all over the place...
after the rehersal, went down for netball training...
then got changed for Sinda...
Sinda was so cool...
the teacher, who i presume is from india made the lesson so fun...
guessing wat lesson?
well its the lesson i hate the most...
chemistry haha...
well i liked the way she teach n jus within one lesson i love chem...
went home ard 9.40...
slept ard 10.30...
was so tired and the pain my teeth was causing me, forced me to sleep thru...
also becoz the previous day i only got 1/2 hour nap.

tuesday was supposed to be a gd day...
well i got y *secret friend* letter ytd.
and mine is obviously a girl...
the handwritting was quite neat, like sarah's...
bt seriously lah the letter she wrote was lame...
lol...
but the letter i wrote to my *secret friend* ( A GUY ) was even lamer...
hahaha...
well if u wan to know who my *secret friend* is then u have to wait till the end of one month...
seriously i did nt expect to pick his name out...
come on la...
i dunno wat to write to him...
finish yr HW on time?
he always does...
study hard??
he always will...
no wonder he is always the top student in the whole level...
psst...make sure u keep it a secret if u managed to find out...
had full dress rehersal for the 10th anniversary speech day
i was so tired...
my appointment got canceled (again)...
aiyo...
thank god i called before i was going...
well jia min lost her ear piece today, while i lost my $50 which i was supposed to pay after my KK appointment...
we tore down the council room like hell seriously...
well mum said she wld help me bt instead i owe her big time...
thanks mummy...

well im still so sleepy...
bt now im going to do my homework then i would sleep...
if i hav time...

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♥Sunday, March 23, 2008 ' 8:05 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

My redeemer has risen...
He has risen and lives

Today had church in the morning...
i was so happy that i overslept...
dots...
i was supposed to leave at 8.30 but ended up waking up at 8.15 when aunty shanti called
thank god...
quickly took a shower and left around 8.50...
got to church only to realise that i was still early...
which was good...
tambourine dance was great as always...
the sermon was so annointing...
after that the alter call was very beautiful...
reminded pastor abt my appointment on tue...
he said that he wld pick me up frm school which meant that i wld be able to attend netball
then everyone had chicken rice
haha...
went home with shanti akka n her family...
they were all so funny really...

came home and slacked...
decided to slumber from 3.00 to 5.00
but only woke up at 7.00
which meant that i missed part of *yar antha star*
aiyo but atleast i woke up in time to watch *Kaushik* sing...
the guy was a pro...
right from the beginning i prophesiced that he would win...
and guess what??
he did win...

now im goin to do my homework...
oh the friendly btw smb n woodlands is canceled...
i wonder why...
anyways gd bye...
& HAPPY EASTER

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♥Saturday, March 22, 2008 ' 9:00 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

like so many people were bloggin about relationships...
so decided why be the odd one out...
haha...
well i really think that relationships dn last...
esp if ur havin one in which u ppl dn trust each other
i jus had a relationship (teeya supposedly would know)
and seriously i dunno why i wanna get my own ass busted...
never wanted to hav a relationship esp after having 2-3 which made no sense...
except the one with deva
lol...
bt really...
the fellow really wanted to stead n all of a sudden went on ramping abt how he does nt wan to get hurt like his other 2 relationship n stuff...
if u can't bear to hav it broken then why bother??
u shld seriously move on ryte??
aiyo this fellow so got on y nerve...
1st he says he wants...
then he says he don't
he keeps me hanging on...
we're not moving on...
oh plz...
as teeya wld already noe i wasn't really interested...
he was so fickle minded...
what a i doll or something??
if u think so
then watch out...
dn make me become a voodoo doll...
then u wld regeret life so much...
well i and him had a conversation yesterday and as usual i decided to let the whole world noe what kind of jerks guys can be...

.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
apple
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hehe
Krish ™ says:
orange
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so wazzup/
Krish ™ says:
nothing
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
wah u super tall sak
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hehe
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so nver go out?
Krish ™ says:
went to church
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hey my name is arvind
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
not aravind
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hehe
Krish ™ says:
i noe
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
den y u spell my name as aravind
Krish ™ says:
where?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ur blog link
Krish ™ says:
oh ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
haha
Krish ™ says:
so wat ru doing?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
nth much juz slacking
Krish ™ says:
ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
anyway i tink we remain as frens?cause i dun see it going far!
Krish ™ says:
as in?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i dun wanna be hurt again
Krish ™ says:
who wants to be
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
my previous 2 relationships had so many hiccups in d end breaking up
Krish ™ says:
well ok...bt jus wanted to ask wat do u mean by its nt goin far
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
u say ur mum will look for u some guy n u will marry him n settle down
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so yeah so nvm
Krish ™ says:
haha okok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
yeah so/
Krish ™ says:
nvm
Krish ™ says:
its ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so wad does dat mean?hehe
Krish ™ says:
since u wan us to remain as friends...sure why not...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
sure?
Krish ™ says:
yes
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok if u say so
Krish ™ says:
i say so?? come on la...u wanted us to remain friends n now u say if i say so
Krish ™ says:
wat is yr actual motive
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i dunno
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i like u
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
but i dunno lar
Krish ™ says:
?
Krish ™ says:
?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok honestly wad would u want me to be?
Krish ™ says:
what i wan u to be??
Krish ™ says:
as in when u grow up?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
haha nt in dat sense
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
as in personally wad would be comfortable 4 u me to be as ur fren liddat
Krish ™ says:
oh well...
Krish ™ says:
i dunno either
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
u r ambitious and i seriously dun wanna stand in ya way
Krish ™ says:
did i say u were standing in my way
Krish ™ says:
we can be friends
Krish ™ says:
bt 1st we need to settle all the misconceptions u hav abt me
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok start
Krish ™ says:
well how wld i noe wat u think abt me?
Krish ™ says:
i can't read yr mind
Krish ™ says:
or in this case
Krish ™ says:
read yr words n find out wat u think
Krish ™ says:
bt i noe one misconception u hav
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i seriously find u as a very gd life partner
Krish ™ says:
n that is the fact tat im nt so tall...haha...
Krish ™ says:
i was jus tiptoeing becoz my face cld nt be seen
Krish ™ says:
lol
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
haha
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hhmm yeah as i was saying
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i tink u ]make a very gd life partner
Krish ™ says:
ok that might be true...bt not fully...takes time...
Krish ™ says:
next?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
but i feel like u r a gd wife and nt gd gf
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
u get wad i mean?
Krish ™ says:
oh so yr saying im too old
Krish ™ says:
lol
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
aiyah...i mean u r meant for serious relationship
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
like marriage
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
for steadying i dunno
Krish ™ says:
oh
Krish ™ says:
be4 tat
Krish ™ says:
i wanted to confirm...yr apple right?
Krish ™ says:
n im orange?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
yeah
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
testing apple
Krish ™ says:
okok
Krish ™ says:
orange
Krish ™ says:
haha
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
kk
Krish ™ says:
im ornge here
Krish ™ says:
why in my blog u said yr own nick?
Krish ™ says:
apple??
Krish ™ says:
lol
Krish ™ says:
nvm jus carry on...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
kinda like sign off
Krish ™ says:
ok
Krish ™ says:
carry on
Krish ™ says:
n dn reply slowly...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
haha
Krish ™ says:
hehehs
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
yeah ok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hmm i mean i realli would like u as my wife but since ur mum n stuff i dunno datz y i haf been tinking if dis would go far
Krish ™ says:
haha funny okok
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
and u said ur mum is like the better deicder dan u
Krish ™ says:
hmm
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so i tot in d end its better to let go now den suffer later?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hehe
Krish ™ says:
ok sure...
Krish ™ says:
now tat is one misconception u hav too
Krish ™ says:
u can't expect me to grow up stickin to my *mum decides wedding* thing
Krish ™ says:
as i grow thoughts change
Krish ™ says:
n when i meet a better life partner in life
Krish ™ says:
later on in life*
Krish ™ says:
my mum wld giv in to me
Krish ™ says:
yup so that;s that
Krish ™ says:
glad tat we wld still be friends...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
how abt more dan dat?hehe
Krish ™ says:
whaa??
Krish ™ says:
didn't u say u wanted it to end now then suffer later
Krish ™ says:
i think yr right
Krish ™ says:
i dn wan anyone to suffer
Krish ™ says:
u or i
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hmm hw abt we juz give it a go
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
i emna nw i m clear?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
r u/
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
*/
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
*?
Krish ™ says:
giv what a go?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
us
Krish ™ says:
oh...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
yeah so wad us ay?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
if u wan or dun wan its up to u!?
Krish ™ says:
u noe im really confused now...
Krish ™ says:
u wan to go
Krish ™ says:
then u dn wan to go
Krish ™ says:
u make things so difficult
Krish ™ says:
hmm
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
haha lets say i was
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
but nw i want us
Krish ™ says:
i dunno arvind...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
so wad do u say nw?
Krish ™ says:
i seriously dunno...
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hmm seriously?
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
wad is ur heart saying?
Krish ™ says:
nothing...
Krish ™ says:
its jus beatin slower than usual
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
aiyah i din mean to say dat lar
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
aiyah nvm lar
Krish ™ says:
alright then i got to go soon
Krish ™ says:
so in case i forget to say bye later
Krish ™ says:
im saying it noe
Krish ™ says:
now*
Krish ™ says:
lol
Krish ™ says:
jus in advance
.:: BaDbOiZ ::. www.arvooney.blogspot.com says:
hey can we juz stay as we were before this whole conversation?

right so does this make sense??
go and get a life big boy...
OH YEAH AND ARVIND IM SORRY TO AKE THIS PUBLIC BUT I JUS FELT LIKE IT...
i dunno if what i did was so wrong...
bt i can't be bothered
next time think twice about what u speak as it wld hav great effects...
well today was so smashing...
went to get my bursary with mummy dearest then went to little india had mutton briyani...
woohoo...
haha then i n mum chated abt how life shld go on...
n she seriously thought tat the fellow was funny?
she did not even bother scolding me abt goin on wif him n stuff...
she was like *i wonder how u ppl fall in love jus by chatting online*
ha...
i did not...
i never fall in love till the right one comes along...
my mum thought that the fellow wasn't so good looking...
no offence,,,
bt he was short n fat...
no saying im slim...
bt im ok...
haha...
homeworks ought to be completed asap...
tml church is in the morning...
its easter sunday...
haha...
will update tml yeah...

note:if u thought that i was kidding abt u being my mortal enemy, yr wrong...coz i did block you so that means we wld loose contact...though u may hav my blog id...it wld happen 2 change soon...so yeah sorry ah...actually i dn hav to say sorry to u...sorry to myself wasting my time of u...n lastly let me jus say it once again....
I HATE YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART... :)

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♥Friday, March 21, 2008 ' 5:33 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

*THE STUDENT COUNCIL EXECUTIVE MEMBERS*

Front Row from Left : Abigail ( Planning Co-Ordinator )

Tracia ( Welfare Co-Ordinator )

Si Ying ( Chairman )

Jian Wen ( Advisor )

Back Row from Left : *ME* Krishna Veni ( Secretary )

Veeknesh ( Vice-Chairman )

Cai Ning ( Vice-Chairman )

*Guy in Yellow* Reynolds ( Logistics Co-Ordinator )

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♥ ' 5:09 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

*MR.RAJ'S BIRTHDAY PARTY ORGANISED BY EX-CO*

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♥ ' 3:45 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

Im so in love with God...

He redeemed me and i worship him with all hope

Dying for me was the greatest present he could give me...

Thanks Father for dying for my sins.

Your mercy and love endures forever.

its good friday today...

woke up n gave thanks to god

followed by a fasting prayer

then left for church...

worship was wonderful...

who cares about being tired...

as long as u can giv all u hav to him...

tambourine dance was a bit dry esp since we stopped the *whoo* sound...

bt actually it was revived as we started shouting *amen* and *hallelujia*

the e message was great...

somewhat it gave me confidence to live everyday...

i can't be bothered abt dying...

it seriously can't happen now...

tuesday we celerbrated chun tung's birthday even though it was on wed...

we were all nt free on wed.

well he got a sweet surprise when he realised that we got him a cake n everything.

haha

i loved the smile on his face.

wednesday was also mr.raj's birthday...

alot of rush here and there...

had netball training after sch

along with npcc training

then went to pick up mr.raj's cake at q-bread at MRT with rey

and bummer he saw us...

bt he did nt realise anything.

bt suspected sumthin was wrong coz i did nt answer him properly n rey was blur blur...

haha he went thru sun plaza while i n rey went all the way near veeky's hse and came by broadway.

we reached faster n when he reached sch he saw me n was like *how come u reach faster than me*

ahaha.

si ying and i walked him to his sinda classroom (mr.tamil's classroom)

he asked us to...

well when we got there he tried to go in by the back door where mdm.vani n mdm.gan were seated...

aiya who locked the back door??

he always gets in by the back door...

well anyway mdm.ani sat lookin straight while mdm.gan was coverin her face n he was like *woo ahahahaha*

n he knew wat was happening n whlaaa

he entered the front dorr as everyone popped the part poppers at him...

haha

he was like thank u n everythin...

finally after the sec 1 councillor induction programme the whole council had gathered to celerbrate,,,

mr.zaf,mr.gwee,mr,tamil,mdm.vani,mdm.gan were present as well...

um mdm vani gave us a programme to handle...

seems like we would be havin a graduation ceremony for the CCA leaders, NE abassadors and the Class committee

so the whole exco+mahirah got invloved...

mdm vani told mahirah to get a co emcee alon with her...

n i asked if i cld n she was like ok...

tat meant now im an emcee

yay...

after so long u noe...

check up is on tue next week...

pastor along with reuben ( my partner in crime...he volunteered...love him ) will be accompanying me...

i seriously hope everythin is fine coz i had 2nd thoughts after havin my 2.4km on wed...

wow the pain was unbearable...

i sat in the toilet crying...

thur the student council got together to do the selection for the excom...

being the present ex co my mind was in confused mode...

until the nominees came n gave their speech of why they wanted to be in the exco...

from there i narrowed down my 11 ppl...

still alot u noe..

so i had 3 voting papers...

all the 8 exco had 3 votin papers while the rest of the council had only 1...

so we made very critical decision...

after tat the rest of the exco except me n tracia were clooating the votes...

i went for netball tournament while tracia went for band...

netball tournament was in our homeground...

with pasir ris sec...

quite nervous...

esp becoz the training the smb girls had went all over the place after they came...

lol...

well we still fought on...

i fell down n injured myself a bit...

bt not too much coz the game hadn't even started yet...

game started the 1st set ended with 5-10 with us in the lead by 5 points...

2nd set we were leading by 6 points...

well in the 4th set the most memorable one was my last goal...

we were left with 30sec in the game n mr.tamil was like *onemoregirls*

haha

so at tat time it was rushy n we missed the ball n so did pasir ris

throw in was ours bt the opponent got it she threw n it bounced near our goal circle where the GK ran out to get it bt too late rasiqah got it...

since the GK was far frm me...

way far she was outside the goal circle...

so rasiqah passed the ball in where i took a shot...

my ball was actually out...

almost...

i knew...

i always gauge my balls right n i was sure tat it wld go out...

bt actaully it went in...

and at the point the whistle rang...

it was right on time...haha...

the ball was scored at the end of the 30th sec...

n mr.tamil forgot every mistake i had made n was smiling...

hahah...

i agree i made mistakes...

i missed e ball a few times...

i did not score a few times...

i did nt catch e rebound 2-3 times n the opponent got it..

i wld work on it...

n i wld show my best shot when we play against woodlands on monday...

the final score 33-21

we won

haha

thanks to all our sch mates who were ther to support us...

thz afiq for cheering me on n *good luck* ing me when i scored

n abby for screamin my name frm the 2nd floor...

haha

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son taht whoever believed in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

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♥Monday, March 17, 2008 ' 8:27 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

ha life has been so messed up recently bt i guess im moving on...
thankfully...
last time i blogged was tue...
well i dn rmb what happened on wed...
though i rmb that on thur our amaths lesson was ablast...
yaya...
mdm.vani n us were rocking out...
haha...
and i still had not started on homework...
lol...
oh well after that went to chin hong's house to start on our women's right campaign
fact was they started and i jus cane on...
it was my 1st meeting coz i was always busy...
i was supp to go to serangoon and had no idea where it was till i saw the map and then got a bus to chin hong's place...
the area there was so ulu ulu...
hehe i had no idea where to go...
i felt so lost till chin hong came to my rescue...
well he live on a landed property...
how cool...
i slacked there with nothin to do...
queenie, andrea and clarence were already there...
i felt so odd coz andrea and clarence made a pair
followed by queenie and chin hong...
felt bad to intrude hahas...
anyway when i got so bored with nothing to do i decided to leave n that was when chin hong tapped my back and said careful and asked me to msg him when i got home n stuff...
he wld be a great dad someday lol...
then found a shorter way home yahoo...
went home n slacked...

so friday was not so bad...
had phy practical frm 9.30-11.30 then went to the library with tracia...
then changed to our cool outfits...lol
then met the guys...
veeky was so late...
jian wen n ben were there...
met rey at yishun...
sadly, siying,cai ning and abby did nt make it...
well as always we noe the first 2 dn really join in...
bt abby was really busy...
sorry for bein evil bt i n tracia were glad that the someone did not come or it wld hav spoilt our whole trip...
went to cityhall
whaa the place was so ex...
ate at burgerking then decided upon sentosa...
everythin there was so cool until we went to the place where we were supp to hav our prom night...
gosh i was so freeked bt decided to keep my comments to myself coz veeky n tracia worked hard...
then i cld nt contain...
i was furious...
paying $65 bucks for this???
whaa if our sch mates ended up there they wld be so mad...
well then continued out venture...
ended it with the gang getting seperated lol...
with me n ben on one train n the rest way behind

saturday was freeky...
we started off early and figures tat we shld nt hav listened to ben n instead shld hav met at a later time...
bt anyway started off and got to our destination.
was so excited n nervous...
a lot of ppl turned up for the selection
we were registered n assigned numbers....
mine was S38
my first game went fine i managed to score both the times i got the ball
bt tat was it...
my 2nd game did not allow me to show my talent...
i was stuck there for so long...
n when the ball came my GA thought i was so short that she threw a ball right in front of me that my opponent caught me...
i cursed her inside as she did nt make a wise wnough decision to throw high ball or back ball...
sometimes she even delayed n when i was free she did nt bother throwin it to me...
in the we did nt score even 1
and she did nt get in either.
bt nevertheless i wasn't disheartened and moved on with life...
thanks abby n ben for accompanying me and supporting me al the way...
after that ame home changed went to church for cleaning n after that went to shati akka house for prayer...
gramps got me so mad...

sunday was the best day of my life...
supposed to hav netball training bt it got canceled...
yay...
i got to go to church...
so happy becoz did nt get to do tambourine dance last week n thought would miss it again
bt god is good...
church went fine...
went home to chiong all my homework...
bt did nt work out...

so stayed in today...
n im still struggling with homework...
hoping to finish it 2nite...

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♥Tuesday, March 11, 2008 ' 9:33 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

everyone has been very nice to me recently...
maybe its becoz the word has spread abt my illness...
or whatever it maybe i dun care...
nothing is goin to come my way...
well netball camp was great...
through all the scolding. screamin,shouting i still got into the sch team for the sch's challenge league...
well tat means im missing church on sun becoz i'll be havin training...
arghh
can't miss church...
love church,love god...

anyway 1st 2 days has been great so far except for the fact that i am
PAINFULLY, DEPRESSINGLY, NOT IN LOVE BUT ATTACHED
isn't tat horrible...
officially was attached during my amaths lesson...
i mean i dun even noe aravind tat much...
bt he has been pestering me so much tat i had to get him off my back...
so i said yes...
it sucked huh...
i cld nt take back my words...
aiya...
well i jus hope never to hear frm him again...
u noe we had a conversation online and he says he doesn't love me...
hasn't gotten tat deep yet...
so i was thinkin then why make my life miserable...
bt till now...
this moment i feel as if im nt attached...
lets jus move off this sub ks...

im jus nervous for my upcoming netball for the worlds 2011 spore team trials...
everybody has been doin a great deal of prayin for me...
thanks a lot peeps...
i appreciate it...
if anyone wld like to come the nearest mrt is orchard...
frm there u wld hav to go to the control station n ask how to get to CCAB evans road...
then i guess they will tell u a bus no.
and u will get there...
if yr wonderin why i dunno its coz i will only find out on the day itself...
hehes...
well guys...
i need yr support...
i need this great opp.
n i really really wan this...
so help me ok...

oh n anthony had been so nice to make me a video after he knew i was havin problems with my heart...
nice of u anthony...
yr a great friend...
oh n u owe me a treat...
haha

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♥Friday, March 07, 2008 ' 8:50 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

u noe today im so happy...
yes i am...
not the sad veni or worried veni who is afraid of dying...
coz today i went thru somethin tat proved tat 99% i dn hav any prob...

sch was great and everything...
loads of homework lor...
1 week holidays jus begun
and i hav to buck up...
esp for tamil...
an A1 student getting B3 is jus nt right...
my report book came yesterday...
i passed everythin except science...
48...
with an A1 for amaths i was pleased...
hehe...

tat was when i realised that i did nt felt so tired or weak...
i was nt catchin my breath...
i had no heart pain...
yay...
bt seriously there is no telling...
maybe it might take effect soon
bt lets all be positive...
oh btw my appointment is i2 weeks time...
reshmi n rovena were there 2dae...
i mean seriously thank god i wasn't staying over...
ard 7.00pm we had babecue...
i had fun...
even though i was doin it for ppl i still had fun
my juniors were like "veni is this ok" "veni can

came home after sch today and got ready for camp...

jus grabbed a shirt n shorts my towel water bottle utensils and left as i was nt goin to stay over...

trained hard today...

i hav tis" "veni yr so nice"
hehe i had fun...
finally ard 8 i had my chance to eat...
whaa the chicked hot dog and fish ball were tasty...
hehes...

tml is goin to be a long day...
training starts ard 9-12
then 2nd session is 3-6
last session is 7.30-9.30
after tat hav to go home...
mum said she wld fetch me...
thanks mummy...
we wld nt want mas selamat kidnapping me
hehes...

*TAKING LIFE POSITIVE EVERY DAY AS IT PASSES
HOPING THAT I WILL BE ABLE TO OPEN MY EYES AND SEE MY CEILING AGAIN
GO OUT OF MY HOUSE AND MOVE LIKE NORMAL AGAIN
THINK OF THE PAST AND SMILE KNOWING THAT A GREAT MIRACLE HAS HAPPENED
AND KNOWING THAT HE LOVE ME FOREVER

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♥Thursday, March 06, 2008 ' 6:00 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

oh gosh...
i woke up very early becoz i did nt wan to die sleeping...
i cld nt even sleep last night...
cried myself to sleep and had nightmares of people standing in a graveyard...
thought that when i go to sch i will be better...
bt it got worse...
mr.chong was wearing black!!!
hey not tat i hate the color bt at this point it creeped me out...

i felt the pain...
i did nt hav it till now...
maybe its jus over working...
mum says to be positive...
she said that is the doc had nt said anythin i wldnt hav felt any pain...
well i hope even the x-ray was the wrong one...
hehe...

i kinda over worked myself now and then...
bt frankly i felt nothing...
i think its a hoax...
i hope it is...
or even if it was a miracle has to happen now...

told ben and abby abt it...
abby was devestated...
she said she wld blow my heart back if she had to...
dumb girl by takin it out yr already killing me...
bt hey ben n abby were quite sensitive abt it n i appreciated it alot...

i mentioned to almost everyone that i love them and gave them ahug...
fathiah wld hav almost got it...
bt i ignored the qns...
i dn want to be giving hints or else soon the whole world will noe...
so if yr readin my blog and u hav a brief idea...
please pray for me...

im jus pretendin as if nothin happened...
becoz i will go KK to check again...
next week...
so i hope its not true...

thanks to all my christian friends for keepin me in yr prayer and calling me to check up on me...
he was very nice...
he said tat if i needed to call even if it was the wee hours i cld...
he said he wld blast his phone so when i call he will attend to me...
he is so sweet...
met her today and she asked how come im so bubbly...
in response i said...
"i don't feel like im goin to die, god loves me and if i had to die soon i wld nt be given propecies by my pastor that i would be a great asset to god and do his work"
pastor was so confident that i wld nt die...
maybe tat was way i felt at peace today...
he suggested to go to KK...
he said something was wrong...
im taking medication still
bt no signs of breathin difficulties and chest pain or chest pressure or watever doc said...
so im carrin on wif life as normal...

guess i wld nt hav to sleep late and wake up early and stare at the ceiling today becoz i was afraid of dying in my sleep...
bt instead im havin a early night and waking up late tml...
hees...

netball camp starts tml...
i cld choose to go for npcc though its only for sec 1 & 3
bt for the time being i wan to get into the spore netball team n rep. spore...
so march 15 is coming very soon...
i hope im ready for it and i dn hav any complications becoz tis is my aim...
to be ahead of all spore sports sch girls and represent spore as sporean and a member of team smb...

im nt staying over for netball camp becoz i need to blog
and i need my bed
and i need my toilet
can't be fightin with the rest of the netball girls...
almost 60plus u noe...
whaa toilet i bet flooded...
hehes...

well peeps gt to start homework early and maybe chill a bit...
then mus get to bed early...
im tired of starin at the ceiling and waiting to die...
its time to move on sleep soundly with the ray of hope shining through my window...

I LOVE ALL MY GIRLS AND BOYS
PROMISE YOU WON'T FORGET ME
AND PROMISE NOT TO ASK ME ANYTHING IF YOU HAVE READ MY BLOG
BYE LOVES

*VENI LOVES HER PEOPLE

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♥Wednesday, March 05, 2008 ' 8:12 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

Yeehaa...

im nt crazy
jus being positive
coz i might nt live long
and however long it may be i hav to keep trying
life is short for me...
so i wld tresure every moment i have...

today as usual sch went fast...
bt
check up was so slow...
mummy cried...
plz mum dn cry...
i love you so much...
my time wld nt end so soon...
i hav things to do...
till then god won't let me go frm you...

no mood to post anymore...

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♥Tuesday, March 04, 2008 ' 7:24 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

BOO
today went to sch with very gd mood...
never felt so gd before...
i felt so great i told my grp if they were wearing ankle socks they wld hav to buy smb socks...
woah everyone pulled up their socks like hell sia...
hehes
then caught khai and shirlynn n showed them some love ( ask them to buy socks )
wanted to show more love to radhiyah...
the girl well known for nt being able to see her socks...
well well she took out her smb socks bt since she refused to pull it up i told her to take out her shoe n pull it...
also tat needed some convincing....
after wat seemed like ages she listened...
then went ard tellin all my grp members to pull up their socks...
some nt happy lor...

hey bitch nt happy come straight to my face ok...
i dn care who u r...
whoever's friend or twin sister u maybe jus say it to my face...

guess radhiyah wasn't happy wif me went n told chair tat i humiliated her...
hey great job la...
u obviously went to a person who had the same problem as you...
well i was unhappy when i saw chair and cai ning whisperin away after talking to bitch
so i jus ignored them...
went for eng lesson hopin tat my mood wld improve becoz i was supposed to be happy 2dae ok...
well no...
it hopelessly became horrible...
chair wrote me post it sayin tat she noe's i was mad becoz of wat radhiya said to me n she was sorry as she was also nt being a gd example
then she wanted me to get over it fast...
arghhh
i was nt angry wif wat radhiya said becoz i had no idea at 1st...
it was the fact tat she was rude, defient, and obviously wasn't respecting me
n when she said how come si ying never check her grp's socks i went over the edge...
how wld i expect to get respect or even standard attire when u r not giving it...
so i told radhiya to go to si ying's grp becoz she liked it there right...

wtf...

u knew i totally ignored u coz i wasn't very happy...
u hav been told many time dear tat u hav to do somethin abt it...
did u??
u say uve been trying bt where is the effort...
u were supp to be looked up to as a gd example...
nt a bad one...
i dn get the respect anymore...
ppl think u r doin the right thing...
so be it...
keep yr status coz its really useless...
im sorry if i offended u
bt i felt i had to say what i had to...
ive jus given up coz i noe after bitch's batch takes over even the minority wld be down coz even her attire is not standard enough...
so will luck to u ppl...
i can't help...
lost hope...
n minority ppl i hope u dn follow blindly...
hav a mind of yr own...
n im sorry chair becoz i had to make my feelings clear for u to noe...
dun hav courage to tell u face to face...

sadly cld nt make it for netball becoz i had to finish my letter writting n essay...
well i was bored really jus sittin dwn n watching...
i guess at the end of the day i was happy...
n now im feel so much better for telling u how i feel...

Its too late to apologise...
Its too late...

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♥Monday, March 03, 2008 ' 12:42 PM ♥

Awesome. ♥

oh dear oh dear...
i felt myself bloom back to the flower when u started giving me the words i longed for...
bt soon as time past when i wanted to noe yr past...
i had to come across it...
and when i did without my knowledge tears streamed down...
how much i had to feel...

i loved u so much...
to think that i had waster 16 yrs of my life...
waiting for the time that u wld sweep me off my feet and tell me that you love me...
i waited and waited for the time to come...
sometimes for the pain u caused me i felt tat i wld be better off if u died...
bt now...
if u die what is the world for me??
what importance is it to me??
when all i lived for was to hav a share of the love u had...
if u die without showin me yr love...
without telling me how much i mean to you...
i would be empty...
i would feel the sword pierce through my heart...
if only...
if only you understood hom much yr love means to me...

will u be alive on my wedding day??
will i be able to walk down the aisle with you by my side??
will i have my father-daughter dance??
will u be there when im giving birth to my 1st born??
will u be there when my 2nd is on the way??
will u even be here with me now??
telling me what i want to hear??
will u show me the love that i never had??

thanks anothony for making me feel better today...
im sure i would be able to see my fruits of my labour...
also thanks for putting the video at your blog...
i really appreciate it...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B1aHlS_bThM ( 1st thing that i cried watching )
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvW6nuQ2B0s&feature=related ( 2nd thing i cried watching )

well today i wasn't able to go to sch either...
elaboration is not needed...
so yeah stayed at home n rotted
then i realised tat i had to go for sinda...
so made my way to school
had fun with cai ning rey veeky and jian wen...
oh n also rekha rashidah n vani
mr.raj later came n said tat the clerk forgot to inform the rest of the 4E
so my 1st lesson wld start prob next week or the week after
so i went back with rashidah...
both of us started talking abt the JI fellow n the possible ways in which he cld hav escaped...
so we created hypothesis...

~some how spore wld hav wanted to get rid of him...
so they wld hav killed him n said he escaped...
~it cld hav been internal works...
pl inside,officers,cld hav helped him to escape...becoz if nt he wld hav been caught by now...so why the delay??

whatever it maybe we wld hav to wait till he is caught and hopefully he is not out there making bombs or plannin to destroy spore...n im hopin he is caught soon so that spore wld be a safe place again...still life goes no as normal for all...

Life is precious and there is joy to be experienced in life.

If people are open to seeing the good and joyous in all kinds of situations, it makes life worth living.

It's ok to kiss a fool, it's ok to let a fool kiss you, but never ever let a kiss fool you....

is better to meet the person who will truly love you later, than meet someone now who promises to love you but sooner or later leave you forever.....

Fate determines who comes into our lives. The heart determines who stays...

Love is like a knife, it can stab e heart or it can carve wonderful images into e soul that will last a lifetime